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How To Resist A Heartbreaker Page 5
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Gee, there’d been a time when he’d had no one to think about but himself. Be careful what you wish for.
Turning the corner towards his apartment, a flash of colour grabbed his attention. Scarlet in the midst of the carefully designed neutral palette. A splash, vivid. Bright.
Weird. He got closer. A plant? A red plant. In a black ceramic pot.
Not a pretty plant either—this was gnarled wood, browny-green leaves, a bunch of itsy red petals. He picked it up and examined it. It had a strange smell.
Why the hell would anyone leave him a plant?
Shrugging, he let himself into his apartment where the fading remnants of Gabby’s fragrance hit him square in the solar plexus. Between her and the plant they were going to fumigate him out of the penthouse.
He held his breath as he placed the plant on the kitchen bench. Stepped back. It didn’t look right—too much red.
Moved it to the dining table. No.
The coffee table. No.
It was too eye-catchingly bright, a misfit, chaotic in the sea of…in Gabby’s eyes, bland. God, now he was looking at everything from her perspective too. He really needed to stop that.
He didn’t notice the note until he’d put the plant outside on the deck. Hoping for out of sight, out of mind.
Max,
I’d rate your so-called ‘garden’ a woeful one.
And that’s only because it’s so cool to even have a garden at twenty thousand feet. Here’s something to help it rise up the scale.
Charge Nurse Radley
He smirked and began jabbing numbers into his phone. Made a few calls. On the last one she picked up. ‘Hello?’
‘What the hell am I supposed to do with this…monstrosity?’
‘Good evening to you too, Mr Maitland. It’s a geranium. They’re very popular in France. People put them in window boxes.’
He heard the laughter in her voice and immediately relaxed. ‘If I did that and it fell off the railing, it’d kill someone. It’s a long way down.’ He peered down to the city street hundreds of feet below. ‘Why are you giving me lethal weapons?’
‘It’s a flower, but you’re a guy so everything has to be a weapon, right? It was more about encouraging you to take time out to smell the…er, geraniums. Besides, it’s a sin to live anywhere where there aren’t flowers.’
‘Looks like I veered deep into the dark side, then. I’m good at that.’
‘I know.’ There was a catch at the back of her throat. Sounded a lot like the sighing noise she’d made the other night when he’d kissed her. Then her voice crackled back down the wire, softer now. ‘Hey, I heard about your day.’
‘Yeah? It happens sometimes. We lose the ones we don’t expect and sometimes the sickest ones pull through.’ Exhaustion washed over him. It was never good to let his guard down, to share the toll a day like this took on him. Much easier to push it all deep inside into a hard, tight knot and hope it didn’t get so big it strangled him.
All the time he’d been working on the kid he’d been silently thanking anyone who’d listen that it wasn’t Jamie who was dying. What kind of a doctor did that make him?
Hell, it made him real. An uncle, with people to care about. But for the first time in decades he’d had a taste of what families must feel like, waiting, praying, hoping. So losing a child so soon after working on Jamie had hit him hard. ‘I’m a last-resort surgeon. I get them when the only alternative is nothing at all.’
‘I heard you wouldn’t give up, though. I heard you did what you could and more.’
‘Sometimes it just isn’t enough.’ But if he thought like that he’d never get up in the morning. Years of wishing he’d fought harder against his uncles and more for his brother had only given him a steely determination never to give up. And never to get close enough to anyone to care about losing them. Because, damn it, that hurt.
Her voice brightened a little. ‘Okay, so here’s the deal. Stick your nose close to the flower and take a big breath right now.’
‘Why?’
‘Do it.’ Now she had that take-no-crap charge-nurse voice again. ‘Now.’
‘Okay. Okay.’ He inhaled. Coughed. Stepped away from the plant. ‘Ugh.’
‘Now breathe out slowly. Geranium oil is supposed to help with stress and anxiety.’
‘I’m tired, not stressed or anxious. At least I wasn’t until I found a plant on my doorstep. I suppose you’ll want me to look after it. Water it? It’s like having another mouth to feed. Suddenly I’m responsible for another life. God, the pressure.’
That she’d even thought about the impact of today’s loss struck a chord. Never mind that she’d left him a present. He heard her laughing, imagined the way her head tipped back, the light in her eyes. Remembered how she’d been out here, hot and hungry, on his balcony. How soft she’d been in his arms. How good a rerun would be. ‘I do know a really great way to ease tension. Works every time.’
‘Back to that again? No, Max. We agreed.’
‘You agreed. So you get to have your wicked way with me, and then…that’s it? I’m dumped?’ He laughed. He was never the dumpee. It didn’t fit right and he didn’t much like the prospect. In far too many ways. ‘You’re as bad as me.’
‘We both took what we needed, no questions asked. So, yes, I’m the same as you, Max. If that’s bad then so be it.’
‘Hmm. I like bad. Bad is good. And if we’re so similar you’ll know exactly what I’m thinking. Right. Now.’
‘No. Hush.’ It was part warning, part dare.
‘Yes, Gabby. I’m thinking about how good we were. How it’s even better that neither of us wants anything more than sex.’ At the word ‘sex’ he heard her swallow, her breathing becoming rapid and heavy. Imagining her reaction fired his testosterone surge into hyperdrive. ‘How good it would feel to do it again. Now.’
‘We can’t. I—’
‘Where are you?’
‘At…home. In my room. Trying to unpack. Finally.’
‘I can be there in ten minutes.’ He couldn’t have her here again. Bad enough he’d broken that rule already. Bad enough he’d have the damned plant around, invading his space. ‘I’m very good at unpacking.’
He was?
‘No! You can’t come here. Just stop. Please, this is ridiculous.’ This time panic coated her voice. She clearly didn’t want him invading her space either.
Why not? Did she have the same personal code he did? Or was it something else?
And that was none of his business.
He heard a shrill landline phone ring in the background. Voices.
‘Mum. No. Of course I’m not avoiding you. I’ve just been busy. Just wait…I’m on the other line. What? For goodness’ sake, I told you I don’t want to talk about that ever again. You promised me. No. No. Wait. Don’t cry. Please. I’m sorry, I know. Yes. I’m sorry too.’ Then Gabby came back to him. Harassed didn’t describe it. ‘Max, I have to go. It’s my mum.’
‘Call her back.’
‘No.’
Hell, if he had a mother to talk to he’d put her way up the priority list, too. And if she was crying he’d be there like a shot. ‘Then call me back when you’re done. Because I’m not done.’
‘No.’
Then there was silence. Apart from the hazy noises of the city street. And nothing, but a bright flash of red in a pretty dull landscape.
And a whole lot of questions he wasn’t allowed to ask.
*
The key to one-night stands was to walk away and not give a damn.
So Gabby had heard.
So she’d failed miserably from the start. Despite the bravado and the very frequent use of the word ‘no’, her body wanted to scream yes, please at every Max Maitland encounter. Which was becoming tiresome in the extreme.
Ten days later and she was bordering on lust exhaustion. But not for much longer.
‘There we go, no more spaghetti to get tangled in. All ready for your transfer.’ Gabby removed the l
ast of Jamie’s tubes and checked the dressing on his supra-pubic incision, just below his belly button. His little hands clutched his dad’s and, as instructed, he hadn’t moved. Hadn’t whimpered or cried. Just stared up at her with wide, trusting eyes.
She allowed a ripple of tenderness to flutter round her heart. Wondered how things might have been different…then locked that thought away. No point in dwelling on things past. She’d made her decision and lived with it knowing it had been the best thing she could do. No matter how much it hurt.
But it was always so good to help the littlies get better. Just so very hard to let them go. ‘You’re pretty much all fixed up, little man. Just wait for Mummy to come back and then we can all go over to the paediatric ward together.’
And that would mean no more Maitland eyes staring at her from every corner of the room. Not Jamie’s, his dad’s or his uncle’s—all too blue, too bright and too alluring.
‘Urine output still okay?’ Having let go of his boy, Mitchell stood at the end of Jamie’s bed, his eyes fixed on the four-hourly observation charts. Gabby took a chance to have a closer look at the twin brother that Max had no pictures of. That he refused to have a dialogue about.
They were breathtakingly similar. She couldn’t imagine having someone else just like her in the world. It would be disconcerting. Could they read each other’s thoughts?
Perhaps that’s why they’d had such a rift.
She considered asking Mitchell about their history—but, heck, it was absolutely none of her business. She’d be mortified if anyone pried into her past. ‘It’s so great he’s off the critical list now, and his urine is absolutely fine. Liquid gold.’
His eyebrows peaked. ‘Never thought about it like that before. Pee has really just been pee until now. Having a kid is a real wake-up call.’
‘I can imagine. But don’t worry, everything’s fine. Blood pressure’s normal. Blood tests are within normal limits, that wobbly temp was just a blip. But they’ll keep monitoring everything on the ward and slowly bring you all up to speed with the anti-rejection drugs, so you know what to do when you get home.’ As she spoke she felt a blush start from her cheeks and spread. Fast. The guy was an ED specialist. He’d know the routine better than her. ‘Oh. Gosh. I’m sorry. I’m just trying to… You’re a doctor…’
‘Hey, I’m a dad first. Which took a bit of getting used to.’ He peered at her and chuckled. The first time she’d seen him smile since she’d started working there. Parental responsibility hung heavily on him.
Her heart ached to think how much that burden could be shared if he and Max were on better terms. ‘You’re looking much better, too. It’ll be nice for you to get back to a normal family life at home. Try to keep him quiet for a while, though, he’s still got a lot of healing to do.’
‘Keep him quiet? Clearly you’ve never tried to parent a three-year-old.’ Mitchell laughed, meaning well. But she felt her shoulders stiffen and the familiar emotions roll over her, slamming her heart against her ribcage.
Determined not to dwell on the past, she feigned busy-ness. After the last phone call with her mother she resolutely would not talk about it. Ever. Again. And that meant here. With her new friends. ‘Well, if you don’t mind, I’d better get on. There’s always a pile of paperwork for transfers.’
‘Hey, Charge Nurse Radley, all organised for going to the ward?’
She hadn’t seen Max arrive but now he was there his voice soothed her nerves. Deeper and warmer than Mitchell’s, it never failed to send shivers of something shooting through her. This time it was like balm to a burn.
She inhaled deeply and kept things professional. ‘Sure. And now I have phone calls to make.’ She gave them both a stern, matronly smile. Avoidance plan reactivated. The less time she spent with Max the better. Maybe then she’d get over the lust exhaustion more quickly.
Max nodded towards his brother. ‘Mitch. You look much better.’
‘Thanks.’ Mitchell opened his mouth to say more then closed it, obviously changing his mind.
Communication between the two of them was robotic, only saying what was absolutely necessary. Brothers didn’t act like that. Strangers did. People who had nothing to say to each other. Surely, after a lifetime they could show a little more warmth? And yet she could see in their eyes that they were both aching to reach out.
Almost two weeks of caring for Jamie and she’d barely heard a word between them. Interfering wasn’t her style, but they needed a damned push. ‘You two are priceless, you know that?’ She stared at them both in turn.
And kept the simmering desire for Max in check. Yes, she’d kissed that stroppy, grumpy mouth. Yes, okay, if called to account she’d admit she wanted to do it again. And again. Either that or slap it.
And she really should not be checking out his backside in those scrubs. So, yes, she was all kinds of confused.
But one thing was very clear: after all the reports of how Mitchell and Max had been before the transplant she would not have her ward turned into a Maitland battlefield. ‘It’s great that Jamie’s fixed up and on the mend. But for his sake you two could try being a bit friendlier to each other, especially when you’re in front of the little guy. What kind of message do you want him to grow up with?’
‘Sure. Sorry.’ Mitchell scowled, picked up his son and squeezed him close. ‘Look. Here comes Mummy. Time to get going. Wave goodbye to Gabby.’
The kid waved his chubby hand and beamed. ‘Bye, Gabby.’
‘Okay, I’ll catch you up once I’ve got the forms.’ As always she held tears in check. Something about a cute toddler hit her full-on hard in the chest every time. They had that earthy, homey smell that drew her to sniff their heads. Huge eyes that showed every emotion. That little-man swagger—half baby, half toughy. All cute, and feisty, and enough to make her heart ache.
As she prepared to leave, her attention was briefly captured by Max’s reactions to Jodi. He nodded towards her then turned away, unable, or unwilling, to hold her gaze. Gabby wondered whether it was her imagination or did he seem tense around his brother’s girlfriend too?
Something was very wrong with this family set-up and gossip or no gossip she needed to find out what. If only to produce harmony in the hospital corridor.
‘You be good now, Jamie. I’ll be down to check on you very soon.’ As Max pressed a knuckle to the boy’s cheek, uncharacteristic tenderness flitted across his face. And swiftly on its heels came a blanket of indifference. Emotional shutdown.
She recognised it because she’d seen it in her mirrored reflection all too often.
Then he turned and walked back to the desk at the far end of the ward.
*
After she’d completed the transfer, Gabby offered Max a seat in her office and sat opposite him, keeping the large mahogany desk between them as a buffer. ‘I know I’m way out of line here, but do you want to talk about what’s going on with Mitchell?’
‘What?’ He shrugged.
‘The monosyllabic communication. It’s like working with automatons.’
‘It’s just brother stuff, you know how it is.’
‘No, actually, I don’t. I’m an only child.’
He laughed, pushing a hand through his hair, his mouth kicked up into a half-smile. ‘Praise the Lord for that. I couldn’t handle two of you.’
‘Well, welcome to my world, Maitland One.’ This was way off professional limits and she knew it. But she couldn’t bear to see families fall apart. She’d been there. Was the poster child for how to stuff things up.
And ever since she’d hated seeing people tear each other apart when they should be loving, supporting, talking. Hell, it might be too late for her, but it didn’t have to be that way for the Maitland men.
Infusing her voice with as much understanding as she could, she leaned across the desk. ‘You want to tell me what’s going on?’
‘Some things just aren’t worth explaining.’ There was a warning in his eyes. Don’t go there. His jaw tilted
up. ‘And it’s your business because…?’
Apart from the fact her staff had apparently been dodging verbal bullets—oh, and the teensy-weensy fact that she’d shared his bed—she couldn’t think of a single reason. Clearly he didn’t attach any emotions to the other night and she needed to learn from that. Business as usual at the office. No time or space for emotions.
This one-night-stand thing was hard to get her head around. But if she was going to take charge of her life she had to get used to a lot of new things.
So she worked to keep it less personal. A pen lay on the top of a pile of files. She picked it up, twiddled it in her fingers, hoping it gave her more gravitas. ‘Okay, well, here’s an idea. You and Maitland Two could kiss and make up, at least at work. It would certainly stop us all having to duck for cover every time you meet.’
His eyebrows lifted, the message finally sinking into that messed-up brain of his. ‘That bad, huh? No one’s mentioned it before.’
‘That’s because you rule their world. Who would dare tell the marvellous Maitland twins off?’
‘You?’ For some reason that seemed to amuse him. ‘Why doesn’t that surprise me? You are quite surprising, you know. But you’re probably right. It’s been going on so long it’s just the way we communicate. I guess it’s just habit now.’
‘Then go cold turkey, take a hypnosis course. Acupuncture? If you need help with the needles, I’m a pretty good shot.’ She jabbed the pen in his direction, sat back in her chair and fixed him with her best evil stare. ‘I know exactly where to stick them for maximum pain…er, effect.’
He leaned across the desk until his mouth was inches from hers. Kissing distance. Inhaling distance. Goddamn, the desk would never be big enough. ‘You certainly had maximum effect on me the other night, Nurse Radley.’
Heat shimmered between them. She caught her breath. It had all been going so well. She’d actually got him to see things from her point of view.
But now she just wanted to kiss him again. She looked at his mouth. The way his lips parted ever so slightly. They seemed to be infused with some kind of magnetic force that attracted her. Pulled her. Coaxed her forward. Inch by inch. Until the only thing she was aware of was the lightest whisper of his breath.