How To Resist A Heartbreaker Page 10

  Gripping the rail with both hands, she hesitated.

  She did have a choice. She just had to make it.

  Could she take a chance? Dare she?

  She imagined him calling her name.

  Then she let go and jumped.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  ‘OH. MY. GOD. Oh. My. God. I don’t believe I did that.’

  ‘Good, eh? I told you it was fun.’ Max laughed at Gabby’s wide eyes and pink cheeks. She hadn’t stopped cursing and squealing since they’d unhooked her. And the fact he’d put that smile there fed his satisfaction no end. ‘Rate it for me?’

  Her grin spread. ‘Five hundred and fifty thousand out of ten. Can we do it again?’

  ‘Oh, no, I’ve unleashed an adrenalin junkie.’ He shook his head. Another upside of it was that she hadn’t let go of him since then. She’d slipped her arm into his and leaned against him as if she was meant to be there. Amazing what throwing yourself off a building can do for a friendship. Never mind the libido. ‘They’ve closed the jump shop for today, sweetie. Stop pouting. Maybe we can go another day. If you’re good.’

  ‘I can be.’

  ‘I know.’ He saw the flicker of need there, heard it in her voice. But he’d promised himself he’d take it slowly with her. She’d had a point earlier—they needed to learn how to communicate. Good sex could only get better when two people knew each other well, right? After that, he didn’t know. Distance hadn’t worked for him. Maybe getting to know her, discovering all the faults that he could find in her, maybe that would dampen down this incessant craving to be with her.

  Yeah, she must have faults. Trouble was, he hadn’t found any yet.

  He walked her down past the city-centre shops, along the waterfront, stopping to point out the old harbour buildings nestled between new glass-fronted architecture. Tourists spilled from the cruise ship, smiling and laughing, some dancing to the buskers beating out an old popular song. There was a carnival atmosphere.

  He squeezed her to him as they strolled, ignoring the guilt that he should be doing paperwork or preparing for a lecture he was giving to the undergrads tomorrow morning. And the fact he really didn’t know what he was offering her here. ‘There are a few cool bars over there where we can grab something to eat. This area’s changed heaps over the years. It used to be just a working dock.’

  ‘You know a lot about the place. Is this where you grew up?’

  Although he usually felt uncomfortable talking about his past, he let it go. He could hardly encourage her to embrace new things without trying a few himself. Besides, she had this way of asking in such a way that he couldn’t help wanting to give her answers. ‘I’m a Jaffa, yeah—Just Another Fella From Auckland. I went to Marquis School in the city.’

  ‘Marquis, eh? Very posh. You rich, then?’

  He laughed at her forthrightness. ‘Not really. Just circumstances. Then I had a few years at Otago University. A couple in Aussie, learning the trade. Then back here.’ He chose not to dwell on the early part of his life.

  ‘Did you both go to Otago?’

  ‘Both?’

  ‘You and Mitch. Duh.’

  She often spoke about him and his twin as if they were joined at the hip. How to explain that from the age of six he’d been brought up as an only child? Any time he told anyone the truth it was greeted with too much pity. He didn’t need that. ‘Yes. We did the same course. It’s the best med school in the country.’

  ‘Must have been hard on everyone else there, all that Maitland alpha ego and rivalry. A real force to be reckoned with. Now look at you, both top docs in your field, at such a young age.’

  ‘Yeah, right.’ He didn’t mean to put an awkward silence in there. But somehow it had happened. His tone had been too sharp, too quick.

  He didn’t know what to say next and he definitely didn’t want to delve too deeply into the dark side and deflate her high, so he gripped her hand and steered her into an Asian fusion restaurant overlooking the millionaires’ yachts in the Viaduct harbour.

  The lights from the buildings reflected in the dark water, giving the place an eerie glow. Bittersweet memories dallied with his heartstrings. This was the last place he’d seen his parents, so it was kind of spooky and special in equal measure. ‘Wine? Mojito?’

  ‘For a non-date, you’re trying pretty hard to woo me.’ She cast him a sarcastic smile. ‘Lemonade, please.’

  He ignored the jibe. Some called it wooing, he called it trying to be friendly. ‘You sure you don’t want a mojito?’

  ‘No. I’ve got a bit of residual stomach griping from that vomiting bug.’ Swiping her hand across her abdomen, she smiled. ‘No biggie.’

  ‘Yeah, it hit everyone hard. Took some of my interns weeks to get over it, or so they said. I thought they were just pulling my string.’ Underneath those rosy cheeks he saw shadows. ‘You okay, though?’

  ‘Fine.’ And now she looked embarrassed to be talking about herself like that.

  He took her to a table, ordered the drinks and let the subject drop. ‘So what about you, Gabby? You trained in Wellington?’

  ‘Yes. It was a bit of a hike, travelling in every day, but I didn’t want to leave Mum and Nonna to do all the work at home.’

  ‘And yet here you are.’

  ‘I know. The black sheep.’ She blushed. He got the feeling she was picking her words carefully. This was obviously difficult territory for her. ‘I still feel bad, but I just had to leave. I couldn’t bear it anymore.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Oh…’ Again she seemed cagey and unsure but also like it was a relief to let it out. ‘My mum and I haven’t got on for years, but I stayed for Nonna. Because of Nonna. When she died a few months ago I decided it was time to start fresh somewhere else. So I chose here.’ Her words tumbled out in a stream and he was grateful she’d chosen him to confide in. More than grateful, especially when he knew he’d struggle to do the same with her—with anyone.

  When he looked deeper into her eyes he saw a flicker of trust there—tiny and wavering, but there. And for a moment he didn’t know if he could bear that responsibility when he couldn’t give it back. Something in his chest constricted but he directed his focus on her. This was about Gabby. Not him. ‘Was your mum happy about that?’

  ‘My mum is generally not happy about anything I do.’ She laughed, but it wasn’t forced, more like she accepted her lot. ‘She’s not a coper, and relied on me and Nonna for way too much. But I decided she needed to learn how to stand on her own two feet. Actually, I decided to be the adult, so I enlisted some cheap labour to help her out and then I came here. So let’s just say I left under a cloud. But it’s nothing new. I had a lot of those growing up.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Lots of reasons—I was a surprise, not a happy one. Then I was the great hope. Mum was a single parent. We had little cash. I was…’ she raised her eyebrows ‘…destined for great things. Mum and Nonna pegged me to be a doctor and buy them out of their financial mess. It’s safe to say I let them down.’

  ‘But being a nurse isn’t a let-down.’ Although the pain behind her eyes told him there was something she wasn’t telling him. Something deep that still hurt now. Had she failed her exams? Had she not been cut out for it? Had she plain not wanted to be a doctor? ‘Believe me, I know it’s hard to carry the hopes of those around with you. Never quite meeting expectations, always feeling that you’d failed.’ He knew all about not being good enough. No wonder they shared a connection.

  ‘Not being a doctor is more than a let-down in their eyes. My having an independent mind and spirit never sat easily with them. I was raised to do what I was told and be a good girl. Or else…’ She toyed with her silver necklace, ran her fingers over the diamond locket. ‘Okay, spotlight back on Max.’

  ‘Ugh.’ He took a drink. ‘You are far more interesting. Do we have to?’

  ‘Yes. Parents?’

  ‘Obviously. It’s difficult to be alive without them.’

  ‘Thank
you for that, Mr Maitland. I can see why you became a doctor. I bet you aced biology.’ The death stare returned, albeit laced with a laugh. ‘Your parents are where?’

  Before he could sugar-coat it the word tripped off his tongue. Flat. Cold. ‘Dead.’

  ‘Oh.’ Fiddling with the napkin, she dipped her head, bit along the bottom of her lip. ‘Gosh. I’m sorry.’

  ‘Don’t be. It was a very long time ago.’ He’d gotten over it. Gotten over the fact they’d waved goodbye and that had been the last he’d seen of them. That a few days later he’d said goodbye to his brother, too. His whole damned world had fallen apart and he’d been unable to understand any of it. ‘It was a yachting accident. They were planning to sail from here to Fiji but got caught up in a storm and didn’t survive.’

  ‘How old were you?’

  ‘Six.’

  She looked like she was about to throw up. Tears threatened as she leaned forward and stroked his hair. ‘That’s terrible. You poor things. I can’t imagine—’

  ‘You ready to order?’ Worse than the thick weight pressing on his chest was seeing the pity in her eyes. Hurt was bad enough. ‘I heard the wagyu is delicious.’

  ‘Whatever you think.’ Her hand dropped as she stared at the menu. Obviously his clumsy shift in conversation topic had upset her.

  Damn, he’d done it again. Driven a wedge through a perfectly innocent conversation. They were supposed to be getting to know each other, but he didn’t know how to bare his soul. He’d held it all in for so long it was part of him. And he didn’t feel ready to give her that part just yet.

  With impeccable timing his phone hit top decibels.

  Mitchell. The name flashed on the display and he knew Gabby saw it too. Mitchell never rang. Ever. So this was important.

  But Gabby stared up at him with those huge wide eyes that showed a flash of irritation. Max knew he was walking a tightrope here, and he wanted to get it right. ‘I’ll leave it.’

  ‘No. Take it. It might be important.’

  ‘No way. I’m not falling for that one.’ Smiling, he pushed the phone into the middle of the table. ‘I know this test—it’s double-woman-speak for “answer that and I spear you with this steak knife”.’

  She pushed the phone back, her eyes warmer now. ‘Seriously, take it. You’ve more than learnt your lesson. But next time, any trouble and you’re off that Sky Tower without the harness, right?’

  *

  Truthfully, Gabby didn’t mind at all. Not if it was Mitchell ringing. The intense adrenalin of the jump, then the opposite slump of devastation at hearing Max’s story had jumbled her up, and she was glad for a few moments’ respite.

  The more she learnt about him, the more he seemed to entrance her. Fabulous yet arrogant surgeon he may be, but he came from such tragedy. That could be the reason for his dedication and need to succeed. Motivation came from so many different sources—maybe he was looking for validation through his work. Through sex—he certainly made a success of that. But that didn’t account for all the problems between him and his brother.

  Oh, stop the amateur psychology and stop trying to read into things. What she did know was that the poor twins must have gone through hell. Her dad had never been in her life so she’d never missed him, but to lose both parents at the same time was devastating. And they’d been so young.

  Who’d looked after them from the age of six? How had two little boys coped with the deaths of their parents? And had any of that had anything to do with their rift?

  Staring out over the water, she pretended she was fascinated by the view, tapped her foot to the jazzy music in the background. All the time straining to hear what Max could possibly be saying to his brother.

  His voice had become calm after an initial hardness. ‘Not tonight. No. Another time. Soon, though.’ He paused, seemed to look for words. ‘Thanks, anyway.’

  Not wanting to pry, she smiled—okay, she did want to pry, itched to pry, really truly desperately ached to pry, she had so many questions she didn’t know where to start, so couldn’t—and waited for Max to speak. When he just stared at the phone in some kind of daze, she coughed.

  He blinked and gave her a funny half-hearted smile back. Suddenly he seemed so boyish her heart snagged. For all his sophisticated suaveness the guy had issues that ran deep, and he was obviously still working through them. ‘That was weird. Mitchell has a night off tonight and wondered if I wanted to go round for a drink.’

  ‘Oh? You should go, then.’

  ‘Here we go again with the test. No.’ He picked up the menu and scanned it. ‘I’m not having you run out on me again.’

  ‘Seriously, this is good news, isn’t it? You should go before you both lose your nerve or find something else to argue about. Like who has the most bubbles in your damn lemonade.’

  ‘But I’m here with you. You’re important.’

  ‘I can wait.’ Laughing, she rubbed her shoulder. Since the jump she’d had a niggling pain there—probably pulled a muscle or something. In fact, generally she felt pretty wiped out with the adrenalin high leaching out of her system. She just wanted to crash. ‘Seriously, I’m not really hungry. You go and see Mitchell and I’ll head off to bed.’

  She stood to go. The room swam around and she grabbed the table edge. ‘Whoa.’

  ‘You okay?’

  ‘Low blood pressure, I guess.’ The nausea swirled. When she could focus again she let go. It was definitely a good idea to go home, although it would be a shame to let the evening come to an end. But there would be more of him tomorrow. More tiny steps forward. ‘I’m fine. But I really think I need an early night.’

  ‘Alone?’

  ‘Yes. Alone, Max.’ She tutted, then looped her arm into his as they walked to the main road. He was such a muddle of contradictions. One minute he was intense and sad. The next he was cracking jokes about sex. He’d moved on swiftly from his dark mood. If only he’d give her the whole story. Then she’d truly feel like she understood him. But there was a way to go before that happened. ‘This has been the best night, but we’re still learning.’

  ‘We could learn a lot faster…naked.’

  Yes, please. She batted his arm, shoving away thoughts of how good he looked wearing absolutely nothing. Nonna had always taught her that you had to wait for your rewards because they tasted all the more sweet. Gabby hoped like hell Nonna was right. ‘So, how did we do? You think you might want to do this again another night?’

  ‘Well, we have the team kayaking trip tomorrow evening.’ His eyebrows rose cheekily. ‘Some watersport is always interesting to add to the sexy mix.’

  ‘Do you really think about sex every five minutes?’

  ‘Sex with you? Every three.’

  ‘Honestly! You’re incorrigible.’ But she smiled. The fact he still wanted her and cared enough to let her know made her feel hot inside. She’d never had that—had thought she’d had it once with Isaac but that had been a fallacy.

  Truth was, she didn’t really want to go home alone. She didn’t want him to go off and see his brother. She wanted to lie in his arms and go to sleep. But she knew if they spent another night together she would be committing herself to him. And that would mean opening her heart, her old wounds, her memories. And she wasn’t ready for that. She didn’t know if she ever could be.

  ‘Let me take you home first.’ His arms circled her waist and he pecked a nonchalant kiss on the tip of her nose. ‘I’m worried about you. You don’t look well.’

  ‘I’m fine. Please, get to your brother’s before it’s too late.’

  A taxi pulled up and he opened the door for her, paid the fare in advance and blew her a kiss. But as he disappeared into the darkness, her heart constricted.

  It was already too late. Somewhere along the line she’d committed her heart to him and she couldn’t do a darned thing about it.

  She fiddled with her necklace, clenched the diamond in her fist. But then what? If she was going to let him like her, and have a decent c
hance at a relationship, she’d have to be honest, tell him what she’d done all those years ago.

  And she couldn’t do that. She just couldn’t.

  CHAPTER NINE

  BAD IDEA.

  Max squeezed the beer can in his hand while his brother left the room to tend to Jamie. Getting together with Mitch was always difficult. Growing up, they hadn’t played board games, they’d played barbed games. Who could hurt who the most. Who could be the bolder, bigger, braver. Who was the best.

  Distance had put paid to any kind of relationship. Hundreds of kilometres and lack of desire on their uncles’ behalf to allow them time together had forced them apart. Until that distance had become insurmountable, geographically and emotionally.

  On the few occasions they’d spent time together Max had been eaten away with envy at the cosy family set-up Mitchell had compared to his own stark, harsh one—and how little his brother had needed him. He’d believed Mitchell had had no space in his life for his twin. And that hurt had dissolved into anger. At Mitch. At the world.

  He knew Mitch had been jealous of him too—jealous of the money, luxuries Mitchell’s family couldn’t afford. Gradually that mutual jealousy, fuelled by their uncles’ own dislike of each other, had poisoned them against each other.

  So he should have listened to his gut and stayed with Gabby. But, for Jamie’s sake, he had to try. And he knew if Gabby got wind of any kind of worsening of relations between him and his twin there’d be hell to pay.

  Hell, since when had he answered to a woman?

  Since he’d fallen, literally, for a stubborn, newly signed-up member of the adrenalin-junkie club.

  The door swung open and Mitch reappeared. Like looking into a mirror, Max could read his brother’s moods, his emotions. Today they connected somewhere round about clueless. Mitch sat down in a big leather chair that had seen better decades, his hands curled round a can. ‘Max, I think it’s time we sorted a few things out.’